Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
