this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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