Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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