Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Randomize