I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
