We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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