JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
So. Much. Porn.
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