he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize