Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
