dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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