I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
