I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
