Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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