Its about making memories worth repressing
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
