never play flip cup with pint glasses
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
