that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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