Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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