she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize