I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
pray to the hookup gods
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Randomize
