y did u give ur computer a hand job?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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