I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Randomize
