Only a mothe r could love this liver
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
