do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
