last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM VODKA MAN
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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