So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
