Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Randomize
