there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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