Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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