normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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