Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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