i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize