Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm like, not good at living.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
