Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Randomize
