It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
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So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
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I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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