A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
