I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
