I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
