I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
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i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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