Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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