are you still at the devil's house?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
