turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
