I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
