The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize