I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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