Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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