he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
