Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
