remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
