when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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