my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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